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I think this is where I’m supposed to tell you all about myself, or why I have this website, or where I plan on taking this whole endeavor.

But that’s kind of the key — I don’t know myself, or why I have this, or what I plan on doing with anything. I can’t even decide what I want for dinner half the time, and I always end up eating rice and beans. I wish I was kidding.

In the interest of keeping this brief, I will boil myself down to a list of easily identifiable features.

  1. There is a definitive hierarchy in my affections. It goes like this:
    1. Dog,
    2. Cat.
  2. I like to read.
    1. My favorite book is Frankenstein, followed closely by The Book of Lost Things.
  3. I’m a big fan of TV.
  4. And music.
  5. So, really, any form of entertainment and I’m all about it.
  6. I’m a vegetarian. No one really cares that I don’t eat meat until it’s time to order a pizza or go to a rib shack.
  7. Dire Strait’s “Romeo and Juliet” is one of the best songs ever made. I will fight you if you disagree.
  8. I say “so” more than “like.”
  9. I also say “I mean” more than anyone ever should.
  10. I’m almost 30. I’m probably 30 by the time anyone reads this.
  11. I travel. A lot.
  12. I probably wish I was reading right now. I probably am reading while you’re reading this. And then I’m going to get distracted and go do the dishes.
  13. I have an unpronounceable illness. I will probably write about it a lot.
  14. I take a lot of pictures that no one will ever see.
  15. I post subpar photos to my Instagram on a sometimes-multiple-times-a-day basis.
  16. My goal in life is to grow up to be like this man.